It’s not uncommon for family caregivers and their elderly loved ones to feel as if they’re battling for control constantly. There are ways for you to learn to let go of that need, however, and they can improve your caregiving experience greatly.
Give up the Need to Control What You Can’t Control
It’s only natural to want to control so much for your elderly loved one. You want the best for your loved one, which can often mean that you want to do as much as possible for her. The problem is that your loved one may want to still have a great deal of control over her own life, too. This can lead to power struggles. Giving up trying to control what you can’t is a first step, but it can be a difficult one.
Make Her Environment as Safe and as Comfortable as Possible
Your loved one’s safety and her comfort are your chief concerns as her caregiver. Focusing on those two items can help you to see what is truly important for your loved one and keep you from going overboard. Work with your loved one’s doctors and other members of her medical team in order to determine how to keep her safe.
Prioritize Your Tasks
If you don’t have your tasks prioritized, you’re likely to feel as if you’re constantly bouncing around from one thing you have to do to another. You might even feel as if you don’t know what to do next or otherwise feel overwhelmed. Keeping your task list prioritized allows you to control what you can control, which can help you to keep those urges to control other aspects of your loved one’s care in check.
Make Plans but Be Flexible
You probably have a specific plan in mind for how you think that every day and every week with your loved one might go. It’s good to have those plans, but it’s also important to remain flexible so that when your loved one’s needs or your own change, you can accommodate them. Having backup such as home care providers on hand can also help you to make flexible plans.
You and your loved one can come to a better arrangement for both of you, but it might require you to plan and prepare in order to do so.